Sooo...today I'm turning in an application to a local video store. I'm just really hoping that I get the job! I mean, it's not like I don't need one-i'm pretty much sick and tired of being a bum. WHERE IS THE MERCY?! Anyway, it's gotta be totally rad working in a video store. I have visions of watching amazing new movies before anyone else even thinks of renting them...hands off! I'd be hounding all the movies in the back somewhere, while everyone is complaining and the place is losing business. Seems great...oh well, probably empty wishing. I might not even get the job. Anywho, I seen Resident Evil:Extinction the other night. Loved it. If you haven't seen it I don't want to give the movie away, but I've gotta warn you! Do not leave the theatre!!! It starts out exactly the same as the first one, but...lets just say that it changes into the amazing triquel that it really is. I just really do love zombies. Which makes me mad about something else. Senior shirts-one of my good friends designed an awesome senior t-shirt that had zombies and gravestones on it. It was trully something that I would wear, but it didn't get picked, just because it was too depressing or whatever. Cry babies. They're just mad because they didn't create it. Stupid losers had to pick the design with our mascot on it. How many shirts do we need with lions on them!!! How unoriginal. Ok, now I'm just not going to buy a senior shirt. Sucks ass!!! I want zombies-wah, wah, wah! Ok, I'm not actually crying, but I could be on the inside. :) It was really cool when my bro and I were younger, though. we would sometimes go outside and act like we were running away from zombies. Yep...good times. We'd get in our car and pretend that we were being pursued by flesh eating zombies, and we were having the time of our lives! Man, that sounds like fun right about now. Too bad I'm 18. But, noone else has to know that!!! Yeah man!!!
Sooo...I finally visited my future college and I loved it! It's easy to get from building to building, it's really pretty, and there were MANY hott guys. There was this one and I'm sure I drove my one friend crazy because I would not stop talking about him. He was sooo beautiful...anyway, i think i should definitely start applying for scholarships. See, there's this honor day thingy at the end of my school year just for seniors. It's where we seniors(well, everybody, but we're really the only ones that matter!)have to sit through two hours worth of awards and scholarships and recognition. For the past three years I've HATED it, but since it's my year I'm kind of excited. But anyway, i want to get tons of scholarships and crap. I don't want to end my senior year and just be recognized for what diploma I'm gonna receive. I want to have a grand finale, ya know? Anyway, I have a list of scholarships somewhere. Man, i need freakin' motivation. Anyway, i called about a darn job yesterday at a day care and it turns out that the spot was filled. Arghhhh! Here i am actually wanting to work and I can't even get a freakin' job! Why...i think everyone's out to get me...losers who don't want to work apply for a job maybe because their parents have been yelling at them for the past couple of weeks and a job is practically just given to them!!! Life is too unfair. I'm single, jobless, and I have no car. Not that I don't enjoy being single...I'm free to flirt with whomever, but sometimes i do get lonely. I don't even think that that's enough to get me involved with somebody, though. I'm probably never gonna get married...too much of an obligation. I wanna be one of them power females who doesn't rely on any man. Kind of like Judge Judy. Wait...i think she's married, but she shouldn't be. She's awesome. Anyway, LIVE SINGLE OR DIE!!! Tourettes moment, people! But, no seriously, I think that if you get into a relationship, then you are just sitting yourself up for pain. Take a good friend of mine, for example. Her man's been cheating on her and they've been together off and on for two years. May not seem like a long time, but that's two years of high school. Yeah so, anyway, she's hurt pretty bad-she cried. Stupid bastard! I know that when I went out with a loser guy in the 9th grade he was cheating on me. Did he ever tell me that he had? No. Did i catch him kissing on another girl? No. It's just something you know, as a female I guess. Vibes, intuition, call it what you want. Heck, I'll call it the sixth sense. Only we don't see dead people-we see major insensitive a-holes. What a life...
It's Friday!!! Yippeee! Best day of the freakin' week. So anyway, I came home and I noticed that there was a "worst and best dressed" People magazine laying, conveniently I must say, on my dining room table. So of course, I had to look at it(great relaxation period after a hectic school day). So, I was looking through...passed crap on Britney at the VMAs...checked out perhaps the ugliest dress that I have ever seen...and there it was! An envelope addressed to me and sent from IUS. Needless to say, I didn't really look through the rest of the magazine-I ripped that envelope open, baby! "Congratulations...yada, yada, yada...it is my pleasure to inform you of your acceptance to IUS." AMAZING!!!!! It's crazy though, because I wasn't as excited as I thought that I would be. I didn't jump up and down hysterically, or scream at the top of my lungs, and I didn't do a crazy dance. I think i just said..."Awesome..." Pretty much all I said. I should have done a crazy dance-WAIT! I just did it-kind of delayed, but I'm happy! :) Anyway, it was a great surprise. Kinda cool that my mom stuck it in a crazy tabloid. Full of lies and deceit and retarded rumors-maybe it's a conspiracy! Maybe I'm not even going to college and it's all just a really cruel experiment that the government is performing on me. Their hypothesis: Maybe I'll go to college? Correct!!! I just can't wait...but now there's SOOOO much else I've got to do! Because I'm kind of obbsessed with lists, here's all that I have to do:
1) get scholarships 2) take placement tests 3) get a network ID 4) attend orientation 5) register for classes 6) get a car 7) get a job 8) maybe get a college make over 9) graduate 10) and then actually start classes!
So much to do!!! It's good that I'm in, though. I'm happy!!! Yay me...and Jesus!!! :)
I just finished reading that Teri Hatcher book-IT WAS GREAT!!! It was. I use to think that she was like one of them hos who let guys hang all over them...YUCK...or people who only think of themselves...Hey!!! I definitely know someone like that!!!!. It's ridiculous how this person, who I'll call "IT", only thinks of itself and doesn't realize that no one is really jealous of IT, because no one is jealous of hos, especially hos that hide behind a mask of thick foundation!!! Who does IT think IT is fooling?! Anyway, I think IT needs help!! Yay-let's get help!:) IT is insane!!! I freakin' don't even like IT-I don't even know why I talk to IT!!! I guess it's like how that old saying goes-keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer...but now IT'S too damn close for comfort...YUCK!!!
I am sooo po'd right now!!! I guess retarded Kathy Griffin ran her mouth a little too much at the taping of the Emmy's, so much so that they actually had to cut out much of what she said. And knowing how much of an attention whore she always is, it didn't really come as much of a surprise to me what she said. I guess that when she went up to except her award, she said, "A lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. Suck it, Jesus. This award is my god now." What a ho!!! Who the hell does she think she is!? You know, instead of having her freakin' head stuck in her ass all of the time and not thinking about how heartless and stupid people think she is, she needs to stick something in that freakin" mouth and SHUT THE HELL UP! Yeah, how 'bout that? Instead of sticking that dumb award on a shelf and idolizing it, she could definitely stick it in her huge, monster mouth! I mean, who the hell does she think even gave her the chance to receive that dumb piece of whatever metal it is? She sure didn't do it by herself-SHE ISN'T EVEN FUNNY FOR GOODNESS SAKES!!! No, the God who gave her breath, enough freakin' breath to run her mouth like she does, gave it to her. And, the least she could possibly do is freakin' thank him for it-I HOPE THE DAMN EMMY GNOME STEALS IT FROM HER AND EATS IT FOR BREAKFAST!!! Enough...hell, i need an emmy for the best beotchfest. I can see t now..."The first person I want to thank is Jesus, for granting me with this short fuse. I want to thank my parents for raising me right. Oh, and I wanna thank Jerry Seinfeld for hating Kathy Griffin so much(atleast on his show, but he probably hates her in real life too)..." Thank you for making my day pagan, agnostic, demonic assholes!!!
Sometimes, I have my bad days as far as my looks are concerned, but according to one of my good friends, Cassi, and my mom, I look like this girl. Her names Laura Ramsey(from She's the Man). They're kidding right? Who knows-they say everyone has their twin. EERIE!!!
I am sooo inspired right now...I'm reading a really great book by Teri Hatcher called Burnt Toast. Not only does it have an amazing title, but it is,well...kind of my love right now. It's kind of cool reading it, and realizing that she's alot like me-I can relate, and it's always nice to have someone that you can relate to. She's body conscious, she has a hard time with relationships, and she doesn't trust people very well. But, it's great...while she's going on and on about how terrible she feels about herself and how she feels guilty about treating herself well, she also elaborates on her transformation and inspires the reader to want to change. And, actually let's them know that they can, because change isn't ALWAYS ugly. And, what do you know! I've actually been trying to find SOME motivation to help me change into a better person, a better me. This may be it. Maybe-the Bible should be, but I haven't read it in a long time. Jesus must be really mad at me right now, but he knows that he's always my inspiration. I just can't get rid of that burning sensation that must be hell waiting for me! But, anyway, it takes a while sometimes to change, especially if you want to change for the better-and I HATE that! I want to stop cursing(which I surprisingly don't cus that much this year!), get fit, and actually get on a Bible reading schedule by tomorrow, dangit!!! Arggghhh! Bleeding hearts of the world unite! Anyway, wanting to be better can be torture, ya know?
Eh...it's seven o'clock in the morning, and I could hardly even keep my eyes open last night. My mom and I were watching a Paul Newman flick and I practically fell over! Anyway...I don't really know what to write about this morning, but because I want to get in the habit of writing on this EVERY SINGLE DAY, I'm going to write about something. Senior pictures, since that's what I'm really pumped up about right now. Yep, I've been planning them since early last year. See, what I've been doing is actually quite ingenious. So that I won't look like an uber retard who doesn't know what she's doing, I've been looking through every magazine possible and tearing out poses that I like and pasting them in what I call my "look book." So HOPEFULLY, my pictures shouldn't look like anyone else's, which is what I'm definitely aiming for. I suppose that everyone's going to be posing next to their cars, or sitting chin on hand, or just sitting...and smiling. :) See, I'm not doing any of that! I mean, pretty much ever since I've been in school my school pictures have sucked, but now since it's my senior year, and I can pretty much do them however I want to I'm going all out with them. In other words,they better look AMAZING!!! I think that my grandma's going to do my pictures now... they'll look great. She can apparently do amazing things with pictures on her computer...but, I don't want them to be "fixed" too much. That's exactly why I'm not going somewhere where they airbrush your pictures. I've seen those pictures before and they look as if they're glowing! They're that fake looking! I want my senior pictures to showcase who I am, and I'm by no means perfect. But, i guess everyone else can try, you know? Anyway, I'm wanting to give off a vintage, glamorous, Hollywood vibe with my senior pictures. I'm even gonna do a couple of poses like Audrey Hepburn! That I'm excited about-my grandma's on the look out for some long, black gloves. Man, I just hate the wait! I AM IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION!!!
Soooo...I got a little something in the mail yesterday. It was a card from IUS saying thank you for applying and that I should be expecting to get my letter within the next two weeks!!! I'm so excited right now!!! :) It was kind of funny though, because the day before, IUS actually called my house and told my mom that I forgot to specify when exactly I was going to start. And, that she just needed to know before she sent out my letter. AND, THEN THE CARD!!! OH THE SUSPENCE!!! Anyway, I'm uber excited...my damn intern nametag is practically ruined. For some stupid reason I had nail polish in my purse, and somehow it broke. Argghhh! Luckily, it didn't ruin anything else. But, my nametag?! Oh well, I'm gonna talk to my intern teacher about switching. I think I wanna teach-correction: I know I wanna teach. I'm just not sure about what grade...I'd like to teach either tiny tots or 11th grade. Either way, I'd be a totally fun teacher! I'm sick and tired of rigid teachers who have retarded deadlines and tell you what exactly what you have to do. I wanna teach english-they can write whatever the heck they want to! Geez! Anyway, I'll reform the whole thing, man.
Today, my brother is one year and one day old! Wait a minute...how exactly am I supposed to say that? Anyway, my grandma came over last night and took tons of pictures of him-they're sooo cute. Here are just a few! The last one is my favorite! Enjoy! Oh, and by the way, I got the results back from my TB test-I don't have TB!!!
This Friday, i get placed into my department at the hospital. I think that's where I'll encounter things that will make me hate nursing and my intern FOR GOOD. I seriously hate my intern!!! It's boring...and I think I should have decided to do the teaching internship THIS semester, and never had done what I'm doing now. I think I just know that nursing is not what I want to do! And, I mean, that's what intern is for right? Its an opportunity for someone like me to try something out, only to find that I hate it. Geez! I think I hate alot of things... Anyway, it's my baby brother's B-day today. One year old! He's so cute. Maybe I'll get a picture of him eating cake for the first time...and post it on here! Only here people! Happy Birthday to Josh!
Sooo...I turned in my IUS application yesterday! Yep-i'm definitely college bound now. I just hope they accept me...that would suck because IUS is pretty much the only college I have in mind. I just want to make something of my life. What if I were to have kids(I'm just speculating-I'm not planning to ever have kids!)? I don't want them to hate me because I didn't go to college and I'm working at the local Micky-D's!!! I don't even like Micky-D's! Grease bucket it is. Anyway, i'm actually visiting IUS in about 2 weeks. I hope that I like it. My best friend Hannah is going there now, and she loves it! So I probably won't have any beef with it cuz she's cool. I love you Basgorn!!! Pardon my elvish.
I got my shots today! Really-the exclamation point doesn't mean that it was exciting. Three shots! TB, Hepatitis, and tetanus. I hated the TB because I had blood oozing out of my arm for like half an hour...gross! And, I think my left arm may be in bad shape, at least worse than my right arm, because when I got the one shot it felt like it was going to freakin' explode! But, yeah-not a great day. I started my intern over at the hospital. It was boring and I had to watch a retarded video about personal care, or whatever, and had to answer questions about it. Tonight I have to read through a packet of papers about hospital stuff. Homework already-sheesh! Oh and get this...I can't wear my beloved flats over there. Instead I have to wear stupid tennis shoes, which I HATE tennis shoes. But, I am going to get an uber cool nametag! Exciting! But yeah...the power went out at school today. It was so cool! Actually, it was while I was doing my intern over at the hospital when the lights and everything went out. And, right when I was beginning to watch another retarded video. No such luck, though, because I have to finish watching it tomorrow. Argghhh! But, anyway,my intern mentor sent me back to school and guess what-the lights were off there too. Complete darkness-the toilets didn't even work(the type that flush on there own)! Everyone at school was getting ready to go home early, but then...let there be light. The damn lights came back on, so I pretty much got my hopes up. So life sucked today. Blood leaked from my limb, I didn't get to go home early, and my happy feet aren't gonna be so happy anymore! But, I'm still gonna have my nametag. :)
I need a freakin' job ASAP! I'm just sick and tired of being a freakin' bum, ya know? Maybe its my fault...I've only put like three applications in. I need to be more enthusiastic about this! I mean, shouldn't money be enough motivation? Yeah, I forgot who I'm talking about-*Queen of the Lazy*. Anyway, I'm sick of hos! I know it sounds random, but I'm reading that Marilyn Monroe book and she basically slept her way to the top. So basically, according to that book anyway, if anything needs to get done just sleep with a but load of people and hope you won't contract herpes. Then you'll get anything you want! And all because you have no morals...life is so unfair, though. Meaning: if your a nice person who doesn't do what everyone else wants just because you want to be you=people treat you like crap, but if your a loser poseur who pleases everyone and acts like something other than what you truly are=people love you! Am I in that place between the black and white called the Twilight Zone? GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE! Hello-the hos are obviously on attack. I don't care anymore. You know, about what people think or what people are wearing or ANYTHING!!! Its crazy, but the closer I get to graduating and the closer I get to getting out of this hell-hole of a town, I could care less about anybody...I wanna go to college already and get friends and meet people who are actually mature and fun. People who are well aware of what is going on in this world and actually CARE! People who don't use others and treat you like crap for no freakin' reason! College people! Just my luck, I'm probably just going from the fire into the frying pan...a big freakin' skillet is waiting for me...HELP! It's already good riddance to high school...